...I honestly thought he wouldn't be like the others. Is it me? Do I really have this ability to push people so far away? Am I not capable .. for someone to love me.

I think I smothered him too much for it to be turned out like this. God, what the hell is wrong with me..

I miss him .. I want him... I love him.. but I refuse to be treated this way by anyone. No matter how much it hurts me.