I can't stop shaking.. maybe it's the cold. I don't know. But it's windy out tonight and I have no idea how long I've been sitting here underneath my favorite tree.

I have no more tears to cry. They're all gone, just like I feel I'm gone. I've been thinking a lot.. about everything..

But most of all I wonder.. why couldn't you have told me the truth from the beginning. Maybe it's just me, but I've never had my heartbroken this bad.

And the odd this is, I didn't do anything to you. I never hurt you in any way. Yes, I've lied, but I didn't cheat. I stress you out, but that was it.

You broke up with me to get back with her, and I should have known that was enough. But I was really stupid, cause I wanted more time with you knowing you'd probably break my heart.

But I never thought it would be this bad. I never thought it would leave me .. so empty.

Funny thing is, all I wanted was for you to show me some kind of emotion, but even till this day you couldn't. If you would have just shown me a shred of what you've .. shown her, I would have settled.

I would have settled for anything cause I always had some sort of hope or faith that things would work out in the end. That you would chase after me again and meet me halfway like you did before. So that I wouldn't feel so miserable and that somewhere along the line, you'd start to care about me again.

But that part of me is gone.. My hope and faith has faded and drifted away, leaving me here with this bitterness. I don't feel like I'm strong enough.

And I feel so alone..whose gonna understand me? Even I don't. Even I think I was stupid for caring about you and for staying so long.

Never once have you ever come chasing after me; I always did the hard work. Throwing away my pride cause in the end all that mattered was that I had you in my life.

You were my rock, the only solitude that I knew. I wanted to come running to you when I was having a bad day and you were the first person that I wanted to share something with when something good happened.

But I'm on my own now. And I feel so very alone. I don't want to go home. I can't. I can't bear to be in my room or apartment.

I just can't.
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